Doing it wrong wrong for so long

We do something wrong for so long

We human are funny creatures, sometimes we do something wrong for so long, we believe to be right. But is this always the case?

I am like many of you; once I saw the injustice that has embedded itself into the mental health care system, I felt compelled to act. Over the course of advocating for myself, the battle was very disheartening. Why does everything have to be about money?

We hear this all the time, don’t we? There’s no money, we had to cut our budget. While on the surface, this seems true but is it really? I mean, looking at anything just on it’s surface only gives you a first glance at an issue, at least, this is how I see it.

So, if we dig deeper, are we really broke as a nation? Or could it be true that the money is being spent hand over fist on other, more frivolous things?

Where does the money go?

How many times have you heard that government has bailed out yet another corporation, gave themselves a raise or “invested” it into something? Lots right? This is a clear reallocation of money and it happens all the time. I find myself asking, what is the human cost of this misspending?

Sure, it’s true that there is only so much money to go around but with that said, the more important question here is, where is it going? How is the debt larger yet the “deep cuts needed” haven’t made a dent?

We do something wrong for so long.

An American battalion chief, a keynote speaker at a fire service conference I was attending said; “Sometimes, as firefighters we do something wrong for so long, that we believe it to be right.” Since that day, his words have always echoed in my head. I think this statement is not only true of the fire service but of many other areas in society.

house money capitalism fortune
Photo by Skitterphoto on – We do something wrong for so long.
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Could this be true of our political systems? Let’s be honest, where the politicians put our money can make one shake their head. For example, some local, provincial and federal governments will cut funding to emergency services. Unthinkable; instead, they spend it on flags, trail development or some other trivial project; a move that is the equivalent to you and I, neglecting our mortgage payment to pay for our recreational desires; this would be silly to most. As far as I’m concerned, government spending is one of these scenarios that the battalion chief spoke of.

Like what you are reading? Try Our mental well-being.

I think we can agree that there’s no denying that money, whether taxpayers or personal, needs to go to the essentials first. While a beautiful walking trail is very nice to have; its irresponsible to cut from essential services to have this added bonus in one’s community. When we think about it, it’s silly to keep up appearances when lives are put at risk and there’s a very real chance that some could die because of this decision.

The mental health picture.

So then, why are we being told there’s no money for mental health care but the coffers seem to be full for the wealthy and their corporations? Well, in my view it’s because we’ve been doing it wrong for so long we think it’s right. However, with a bit of critical thinking, we can easily see that our priority should be on the services that benefit the country as a whole.

Given that mental health issues are on the rise because of Covid-19, we need more funding for mental health resources and professionals to help combat this rise. Now is not the time to spend money on things that may be pretty and nice, but don’t provide any long-lasting solution for society as a whole.

Hear people tell their story on Men Are Nuts Podcast

A good metric to use in my opinion is that of human suffering. For example, are people with mental health conditions getting the help they need? The answer to this question is, some. But with that said, there are so many more going without…… Honestly, our fiscal misdirection in our society is making us sicker and is not the golden goose egg we’ve been led to believe. How many people are dying because of it?

And it’s not just mental health, its healthcare in general, it’s a shortage of doctors, nurses, paramedics, firefighters, forestry firefighters food inspectors, police, psychologists, social workers, plow drivers, just to name a few. This is, of course, made worse by the lack of facilities and the tools to do their jobs. How much of a cost is there to the people? These are not mere, “needs to save more,” issues they are real and legitimate health risks to the population. How many people have died because of this “fiscal responsibility?” Lots. Furthermore, what are the economic cost of putting the population at risk for a new stadium whilst neglecting the hospitals?

The cost of favouring a few over the majority is enormous. Yet it is business as usual? There is money to make the health of our nation the priority, we just need to put it where it belongs; on the people who invest the money in the form of taxes to have what they need. People first!

Checkout the book I helped to write:

Lemonade Stand: Vol. III 

Created by Josh Rivedal and Kathleen Myre, Lemonade Stand: Vol. III is a compilation of 20 stories from those who have served in the emergency services and the military.  In it, the authors talk about their battles with PTSD, a debilitating and for many, a life-long mental illness.  So, if you are from the military or emergency service’s, perhaps this book can help you combat the feelings of isolation and fear that frequently comes with post-traumatic stress disorder. Sometimes, just knowing that there are others out there, just like you, can provide you with the strength and courage to speak up and or get the help you need. The intention of this book is to help with that…. You’re not alone.

Also, Lemonade Stand: Vol III was written to help combat the stigma that often accompanies mental illness, best of all, it attempts to give all you served their countries and communities a voice… Which is amazing!

Pre order today

If you are struggling please go here for help: Crisis Services Canada


Checkout our Mental Health Resources Page

Contact me on my Facebook page: The Road To Mental Wellness

The Long Standing Battle
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What You Don’t See
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Where’s My glasses
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What we see

What we see?

Is what we see, really what’s going on? In this post, I argue that the answer is no.

Our eyes, they are the windows to the world. Because of them, you and I can navigate the world and take in its breath taking beauty. But sadly, what we see isn’t always what’s going on.

While there’s no question that waterfalls are indeed amazing, we, with our not so stellar observation skills, only see the rushing water, crashing into the waterway below.

With that said, is that really all there is to see? What else is going on? For instance, we can not see the source of the water flow; nor do we bear witness to the copious amount of erosion happening as the water rushes over the cliff face.

IS what we see, really what’s truly going on?

Our brains, if they were to take in all the surrounding stimulus, we would likely cease to function. It’s perfectly adept at deciding what requires our attention and what it can disregard. We, as humans are attracted to things that move; a survival instinct that helped get us where we are today.

Why does the brain filter out things? Why does it limit What we see?

Interestingly, there are other things going on that influence our perceptions. Things like, good old fashion logic. The simplistic view, pun intended, says, what you see is what you get. In other words, our eyes are telling us the entire story; but, are they? Is what we see happening really a simple logical deduction? Well, here’s my take on it.

Like what you are reading? Then you may enjoy You, Me and PTSD.

In my view, mental illness is a great example of the dangers of taking thing at face value. To illustrate what I mean, I will use PTSD as the example.

person in blue jacket and black pants standing on rock near waterfalls
Photo by Aleksey Kuprikov on

Post-traumatic stress disorder comes with a whole host of symptoms. These symptoms include; Irritability, nightmares, a heightened startle response and more. None of them are pleasant.

To further demonstrate my point, I will pick on one symptom; the wonderful feeling of the startle response. Besides being very unpleasant for the diagnosed, it can be very problematic for a spouse or other family members.

What those closes see when I am scared by every single bang and clang is the often times very intense reaction; being very vocal, jumping out of my chair, etc.

When you couple all this together, what you get from family members is the “walking on eggshells” reaction, rightfully so. I mean, never knowing what will cause this intense reaction is very difficult.

Help for spouses and family of someone with PTSD

With that said, my goal isn’t to put those I love most in the world on edge; despite what they see and how they react to it, what’s really going on is I’m symptomatic. My reactions have nothing to do with them personally and if it were a choice, why would I put my loved ones through such a thing?

It’s true, I get where they are coming from but there’s more going on here than meets the eye. Therefore, the best advice I can give people trying to love someone with a traumatic injury is this; If you plan to be around for the long haul, you will very likely need support from a mental health professional; there’s no shame in that.

Even though mental illness is monumentally difficult for everyone impacted by it, those who suffer from a mental health condition deserve love and support. Equally true, is that those who love us, deserve the same.

Lemonade Stand Vol. III

Lemonade Stand Vol. III is a collection of 20 authors who have PTSD because of their military and or emergency services background. They bravely tell their stories in hopes that will help end stigma within the services and within mental health in general. Its other objective is to give people who are afraid to speak a voice.

When I read the stories from the other authors, it was like I was reading the story of my own struggles. I quickly realized that this book will not only help those with PTSD but may very well provide their spouses and families with insight into their loved one’s mental illness.

Lemonade Stand Vol. III
Pre order today

If you are struggling please go here for help: Crisis Services Canada

Want help fund my book? donate: GOFundMe – The Road To Mental Wellness – The book

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End of another chapter

end of another chapter

Early last week, I had an over the phone appointment with my psychiatrist. It was brief and bittersweet. Little did I know, at the start of the conversation, that this appointment would be my last. She explained to me that she had done all she could. Finally, I’ve come to the end of another chapter.

The long road we travelled together, started in 2018, barely a month after I went off work. I consider myself lucky; we meshed right from the start. However, it would turn out that my relationship with the SSRIs she prescribed, would do anything but get along with me.

What makes a good therapist

Moreover, I would put myself through a pharmaceutically induced hell. As fate would have it, nearly every treatment option failed. Despite this, I soldiered on Pill after pill, I clung to the hope that this time, this would be the one; the one that eased my depression, minimize the toucher that comes with PTSD and ultimately saving my life.

this little tiny pill would become a double-edged sword.

Alas, this was not to be and no matter the level of hope, it was soon dashed by the results; or should I say the lack thereof. Fortunately, it wouldn’t take long for my psychiatrist to figure out what my Achilles heel

So then, what was it that made this aspect of my healing journey such a difficult one? Well, Ironically, it was a medication. I have epilepsy and have been on an anticonvulsant since I was thirteen.

Read Medication, at an Impasse

With it, came an opportunity to plan out and live a normal life because it, lucky for me, completely controlled my seizures. Even to this very day, I am grateful for the life it gave me.

However, this little tiny pill would become a double-edged sword for me. While I got through my day to day relatively unscathed because of it, my slow and slippery slide into the realm of mental illness would be complicated by it.

End of another chapter.

I have been fortunate to have lived the life i have.

As fate would have it, the anticonvulsant I am on would prevent almost all attempts to help me moderate the symptoms of my mental health conditions; for the most part at least. How ironic, a medication that helps me to live was now hindering my healing.

On the positive side, my psychiatrist went the distance with me. She could have handed my care back over to my GP much sooner but wanted to find a solution. Although finding the med that worked for me was largely trial and error; I would have to say that many months of sedation and other side effects were worth it in the end. My psychiatrist was awesome and did her utmost to help; even advocating for me in other ways; often contacting WCB on my behalf. Although this is essentially the end of another chapter, I can move on knowing that we both put up a good fight.

So please, Don’t give up on yourself.

Despite the battle, we did, however, find some meds that somewhat help. Sure, I could be disappointed but I choose to be grateful. While they may not be wonder drugs, they do help quell the suicidal ideation. Personally, I’d call that a win. My friends, going the distance does indeed pay off.

So then, what’s the moral of this chapter in my life? Well, firstly, I now know that if you persist and advocate for yourself, you will eventually get the help you need. Furthermore, I have come to learn that there are some committed, compassionate mental health professionals out there who only want to help and make a difference.

So please, Don’t give up on yourself, the system our the professionals, for they may help you get to the end of another chapter.

Want to help make my book a reality? Donate here: GoFundMe

Contact: The Road To Mental Wellness

The Long Standing Battle
My long-standing battle with PTSD has taught me that there is a …
What You Don’t See
Pictures on social media are cool but its what you don’t see …
Where’s My glasses
Have you ever asked yourself; “where’s my glasses?” Is it near constant? …
We do something wrong for so long
We human are funny creatures, sometimes we do something wrong for so …