Healing with your bros

Healing with your bros – This often-overlooked thing can be just as helpful for men as talking it out can be for others. So, get together and hang with your bros!

Here at The Road To Mental Wellness, we want to take time to acknowledge men by wishing all the men in the world an early happy International Men’s Day November 19, 2022

“Men, we need to talk more. We can’t stay silent about our innermost demons.” As a counselor and mental-health writer, man, and advocate, I couldn’t agree more. Taking time to battle what’s taking you apart from the inside is indeed helpful. My advice? Seek actual therapy to tackle what ails you. Trust me, my man friends, therapy is a safe one-on-one place. It’s perfect for those who don’t like to bare their souls to others.

Equally true, though, is this: men have another – rarely talked about, yet equally healthy – way of “dealing.” In fact, it’s so rarely talked about that I can’t find it on the internet. At least not in the form of being offered as a technique. So, what’s this unidentified way of healing?

In crisis? Go to Crisis Services Canada

Why, it’s healing with your bros, of course! It’s well known that many men don’t communicate like women, yet we are encouraged to talk as if we are all capable of it. Now, before I go any further:

Disclaimer

Disclaimer

This article is not an assault on anyone, women or otherwise. Rather, its purpose is to help a segment of our human population that, like any other, deserves it. If you see something that offends you, that’s not the intention. While what we read, hear, and watch can be open to interpretation, please realize that the above is in fact, about bettering the lives of a deserving portion of our population. Just like yours.

Find articles that may be inspiring to your particular circumstance here:
https://theroadtomentalwellness.com/category/mental-health/

Much love,
Jonathan,
theroadtomentalwellness.com

Download the audiobook version of the book, The Road To Mental Wellness FREE (CH’s 1 through 5 Here)

See, many men do just fine with their mental well-being when they have a few close male friends. Moreover, we tend to enjoy activity-based things together. Things like working on cars, playing video games, and sports. We focus less on the painful matter and prioritize cooperation and teasing as a way to “decompress”

So, my argument here is that men don’t always need to talk about how they are feeling. Rather, hanging with their bros is often enough.

Front and back cover of the road to mental wellness - 8 sings your relationship is hurting your mental health.
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Say you and your best friend take on a project car together. (Insert your dream project here). What generally happens is we go into “problem-solving mode.” a place where we actually get to figure things out. In other words, the focus is mostly committed to the project at hand. Let’s solve it!

However, in-between breaking a bolt and changing a spark plug, a man may say to his bro:

“Man, this week sucked! My kid was acting up all week; drives me crazy!” Followed by something like, “I hear ya bro.” And back to the task at hand. “Sh$%, is that oil leaking from the valve pan gasket?” And somewhere in the course of the time they are tearing off the valve pan gasket, the buddy will turn and say something like, “It’s gonna be alright, dude – it will pass.

Believe it or not, for many, the connection and teamwork taking place and the tiny banter about feelings is often healing, often enough.

My friends, I want to tell you that it’s okay to handle things like you’re wired. Just know that if you can’t shake your demons despite this, get help – tell someone!

Male friendships often look like this

So, why is this so often overlooked? Well, some of it is no doubt a product of our times, that we are encouraged to engage our feminine side more often. However, there are other reasons.

We have given in to so much of the “I’m too busy” narrative that all people fall victim to today. Therefore, it’s hard to form and maintain high-value, male friendships.

Furthermore, we have learned over the last eighty years that human connection is strongly correlated with longevity. Some studies suggest that it can improve longevity by 50%. That’s amazing. Prioritize your best buds; everyone on earth needs time with those they care for – everyone!

Human connection and longevity

Finally, what does this tell us about men and their mental health? If given the freedom to handle their mental well-being in a way that is more inline with their communication style, they can have another option to get through the more difficult moments in their lives. So, go ahead, break some sh$% and do some healing with your bros.

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Jonathan Arenburg

Jonathan Reginald-Nixon Arenburg (Born January 14, 1976) is a Canadian mental health blogger, speaker, and published author. Retired from the fire service and long-term care fields, he has written and self-published an autobiographical account of his life-long battle with anxiety, depression and more recently, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Titled, The Road To Mental Wellness, he wrote it for what he calls “therapeutic release.” He published it in hopes it would help others going through similar mental health conditions. The sales of The Road To Mental Wellness have been steady selling over 300 copies since its release on October 10, 2021(World Mental Health Day). Arenburg has also been involved in a collaborative publication Called Lemonade Stand Volume III, a book featuring 20 authors who bravely tell their stories of PTSD. All authors where from the military and or emergency services. Published by Joshua Rivedal and Kathleen Myers for the i’Mpossible project, a mental health advocacy organization. Jonathan has also appeared on several mental health podcasts including The Depression Files, A New Dawn, and The Above Ground Podcast Arenburg has also consulted with the Government of Nova Scotia and the Minister of Mental Health and Addictions, the Honorable Brian Comer and Candidates for the New Democratic Party of Canada, on improving the mental health care system in Canada. Additionally, Jonathan was recognized in The Nova Scotia Legislature by the Honorable, Chris Palmer, Kings-North MLA, for his Book, The Road To Mental Wellness, his fight to make the mental health care system better. In addition, Chis acknowledged the support he gives to others.

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