It really sucks when depression speaks.Tweet
Humans are a wonderfully diverse species. All one needs to do to see this is to take a look at the numbers of different languages we speak. We are so diverse, in fact, that as of 2009, there were 6,909 on earth; (Linguistic Society of America)(1). Similarly, Major depressive disorder also seems to have its own language. If this is true, what does it sound like when depression speaks?
Of course, it doesn’t truly speak, but what it does do is hijack one’s positivity and replace it with its own repertoire. This hostile takeover makes you hate the things you love by nattering in your mind’s ear; and we humans, if we hear a lie long enough, it starts to become truth. Amazing how our own brains can take something it knows to be true, turn on its head and make us accept a lie as truth.
Indeed, our interior script gets written in the style it’s either trained in or what it’s pre-programmed software has written, genetics. More likely, it’s a combination of these two.
So, when depression speaks, it’s often in a discouraging tone. For example, it will take you out of your entire routine. Saying things like, “Nah, I’m not going for my morning run today.” or “F#$% it, I don’t feel like cleaning out my car.” For many of us, this negative speak can land us in bed for the day; for some, even longer.
In my own experience, when overtaken by depression’s gift to gab, I find that besides being talked out of all that is good for me, I am completely exhausted; drained by constantly trying to fight back against its powers.
Under these circumstances, I find it difficult to rally against depression. I find it so hard because often I don’t realize that I am not my regular, positive self. It’s not always possible to be self-aware and therein lays the problem. Ultimately, depression will win the day with its brand of speak. I say let it! If for whatever reason it slips past my defences, I relent and let it have that day.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, its this;
- Give yourself permission to rest but set a limit. E.g. a day.
- Seek out and or continue to seek therapy.
- There’s no shame in your mental pain.
- Finally, get your ass moving again.
Why not read Anxiety And Depression.
Once you have taken the time to weather the storm, get back to living. Don’t allow depresson’s sneaky one liners to take command of you for long periods. I, for example, will force myself out for coffee or I will find a quiet trail.
So, what does getting moving again look like for me? Well, simply put, at a turtle’s pace at times, whist others, I can hit the ground running. Personally, I gauge it on the amount of residual brain fog and exhaustion I feel.
With that said, if I make it as far as the couch, it’s a success; likewise, if I get up and feel well enough to hit the gym, it too is a success. The important thing here? I tell myself and now truly believe that they are of equal success. I’m tired of feeling bad for feeling bad, no more. It really is ok not to be ok. You got this!
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Checkout the book I helped to write:
Lemonade Stand: Vol. III
Created by Josh Rivedal and Kathleen Myre, Lemonade Stand: Vol. III is a compilation of 20 stories from those who have served in the emergency services and the military. In it, the authors talk about their battles with PTSD, a debilitating and for many, a life-long mental illness. So, if you are from the military or emergency service’s, perhaps this book can help you combat the feelings of isolation and fear that frequently comes with post-traumatic stress disorder. Sometimes, just knowing that there are others out there, just like you, can provide you with the strength and courage to speak up and or get the help you need. The intention of this book is to help with that…. You’re not alone.
Also, Lemonade Stand: Vol III was written to help combat the stigma that often accompanies mental illness, best of all, it attempts to give all you served their countries and communities a voice… Which is amazing!
If you are struggling please go here for help: Crisis Services Canada
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