It really sucks when depression speaks.Tweet
Humans are a wonderfully diverse species. All one needs to do to see this is to take a look at the numbers of different languages we speak. We are so diverse, in fact, that as of 2009, there were 6,909 on earth; (Linguistic Society of America)(1). Similarly, Major depressive disorder also seems to have its own language. If this is true, what does it sound like when depression speaks?
Of course, it doesn’t truly speak, but what it does do is hijack one’s positivity and replace it with its own repertoire. This hostile takeover makes you hate the things you love, by nattering in your mind’s ear. And we humans, if we hear a lie long enough – it starts to become truth. Amazing how our own brains can take something it knows to be true, turn it on its head and make us accept a lie as truth.
Indeed, our interior script gets written in the style it’s either trained in or what its pre-programmed software has written – genetics. More likely, it’s a combination of these two.
So, when depression speaks, it’s often in a discouraging tone. For example, it will take you out of your entire routine. Saying things like “Nah, I’m not going for my morning run today.” or “F#$% it, I don’t feel like cleaning out my car.” For many of us, this negative speak can land us in bed for the day. For some, even longer.
In my own experience, when overtaken by depression’s gift to gab, I find that besides being talked out of all that is good for me, I am completely exhausted, drained by constantly trying to fight back against its powers.
Under these circumstances, I find it difficult to rally against depression. I find it so hard because often I don’t realize that I am not my regular, positive self. It’s not always possible to be self-aware, and therein lays the problem. Ultimately, depression will win the day with its brand of speak. I say, let it! If for whatever reason it slips past my defences, I relent and let it have that day.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this;
- Give yourself permission to rest but set a limit. E.g., a day.
- Seek out/and or continue to seek therapy.
- There’s no shame in your mental pain.
- Finally, get your ass moving again.
Now, you can listen to our posts – go to our Audio blogs page.
Once you have taken the time to weather the storm, get back to living. Don’t allow depression’s sneaky one-liners to take command of you for long periods. I, for example, will force myself out for coffee or I will find a quiet trail.
So, what does getting moving again look like for me? Well, simply put, at a turtle’s pace at times, while at others, I can hit the ground running. Personally, I gauge it on the amount of residual brain fog and exhaustion I feel.
With that said, if I make it as far as the couch, it’s a success. Likewise, if I get up and feel well enough to hit the gym, it too is a success. The important thing here, I tell myself and now truly believe, is that they are of equal success. I’m tired of feeling bad for feeling bad. No more. It really is okay not to be okay. You got this!
The Road To Mental Wellness is made possible in part by readers like you… thank you for your support.
If you are struggling, please go here for help: Crisis Services Canada