Face To Face With My Mental Illness

In this particular type of scenario, there are only two things one can do; one can let the flashbacks and nightmares, irritability and hypervigilance see their hostile talk over to the end and thus allowing them to lock one down in a cold, dark and unforgiving dungeon somewhere deep within my mind. Or…… I could go to war with my what I recognized as the mental health condition known as PTSD.

Because of my fire service background, I recognized these hostiles as PTSD. Because I knew my invading enemy, I understood that I fight or I die. Faced with these two choices my decision was an easy one, having so much to live for, I set out on the road to mental wellness to combat this most formidable foe.

Essentially, I recognized that I had been involved in one too many traumatic incidents and I was spinning out of control into a full-blown mental health crisis. So then, what were my weapons of choice? For one, Giving up on denial; denial allows mental illness to intrude on every aspect of one’s life and will eventually take one down.

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The other weapons I deployed to avoid mass mental destruction was – Firstly, not caring what others thought. This weapon is so important that I would not have reached for any other tool because fear would have been allowed to grow and fester had I cared about others opinions. Secondly, I worked closely with my employer to ensure that they knew and that I was taking time off. Thrid was medical and mental health professionals. Unshamed to reach out to them as much as possible to ensure I got the right care was very essential.  For those discouraged by the system, Please keep going. The squeaky wheel really does get the grease.

Over the course of the year, I have come face to face with my mental illness known as PTSD and have battled anxiety and depression along the way. I have deployed many other weapons on the war against mental illness, Including diet and exercise. There are so many things to try that it would be the longest blog post in my history if I wrote everything I have tried.